I have to rewind back a few days for this one. it all started over the weekend.
we got back from our quick trip to disneyland/california and the next week i had
my midwives appointment, which was a huge releif because they confirmed baby
girl's head had moved down and she had "dropped." the week before she was head
up, and she had been doing sommersaults every night so i wasnt too sure where
she was positioned. friday-river got sick with a sore throat/cold, then saturday
night was hell-rumi got the stomach flu and was throwing up alllll night. to
make it even better mowgli decided to throw up three times throughout the night
as well. short story-it was a very sick weekend, the one weekend where we tried
to plan some fun family things because i was sure baby girl was coming that very
next saturday (my mom's birhtday, march 19th). but plans change. isnt that
always the case though. so by monday night i had caught whatever rumi had and
literally purged everything inside my body all throughout that night. tuesday
comes and i am feeling so weak and exhausted. river didnt have school so we
decided to take mowgli on an easy hike up battle creek. i just remember going up
the tiny hill and telling river i definitely cannot have a baby today because i
dont think i could physically make it. jokes on me. we pick up rumi from
preschool and head home because i have the worst body aches. my kids were so
sweet and so understanding-i jumped in a quick bath and rumi gave me an oil
massage on my bed after (she gets it from her daddy;)). David came home from
work by now. 5pm. as i am just laying there i literally feel like i just peed my
pants, but i know i didn't. i hopped up so quick, all of rumi's perfectly placed
gem stones roll off of me. david is like, are you ok? i had never had my water
break with my other two pregnancies until the very end during transition so i
was somehwhat in denial. david called my midwife, who lives just a few minutes
away, just to confirm that this is truly amniotic fluid, because i just kept
saying, no, this is not happening right now. well she came over and checked me
out, and my water most definitely broke, and i was already dialated to a 3.
crap. is what i thought. my midwife left and said she would come back whenever i
felt like i needed her. david had gone downstairs to feed the kids and put on a
show, and now all i could hear was him puking in the downstairs bathroom. great.
he caught the flu. perfect timing. i just kept thinking, this isnt really
happening right now. this was the week i was going to deep clean, prepare more
for baby, and just get some last minute things ready. well, ready or not she was
coming. i rememeber saying to david, i don't think i can physically do this
right now, i feel so weak. i hadnt slept at all the night before and i didnt
dare eat anything that whole day except water and a banana. david just turned to
me and said, maybe this is going to help you to truly
surrender and lean
into that
trust. my two words that i have meditated heavily on during
this pregnancy. he was right. when you dont think you can, when you are truly in
a weak place and humility sets in, that is where true growth lies. so i decided
to go with that. if i wasnt feeling physically prepared then i for sure was
going to get mentally prepared. "the body achieves what the mind believes." 8pm.
i went into hyper ocd cleaning mode while having small surges every 3-5 minutes.
literally deep cleaned my entire house in like two hours (with the help of david
when he wasnt vomiting in the bathroom). the kids were so excited baby sis was
coming! they helped me blow up the birth tub in my bathroom and loved playing in
it while i was getting my room set up with all the diffusers/humidifiers,
lights, and candles. they really wanted to stay awake all night with me, but i
convinced them that she wouldnt be here for awhile and we would wake them up
when she decided to come. i finally got everyone asleep and everything cleaned
up, disinfected, and ready for baby...well as ready as i could with such short
notice;) the husband was on his own. jk. but kinda. i text my midwife that i was
going to try and sleep for a bit if i could. great idea. i was so grateful i
fell asleep from about 1-3am. it was so needed. then i was startled awake by a
surge. things started picking up. david had gone in to sleep with rumi in the
middle of the night so i stayed in my quiet bedroom and breathed through the
surges as i could feel them coming on stronger. i decided that by 4am if they
didnt let up then i would start to fill the tub and let everyone know. i felt
bad waking david up, but by 4am things were definitely not slowing down. i text
my midwives and let them know i was going to jump in the tub and to come over in
the next hour. rumi had woken up to be with us and i just have to say she was
the sweetest thing the whole night. she was excitedly whispering and would come
check on me in the tub every so often. i love her. she stayed awake up until
about 6:30am. she was a trooper. by 7am though baby girl was coming. i tried a
few different positions. i got out of the tub a couple times, but i always found
my way back in. ha. i wasnt set on if i was going to have a water birth this
time. i actually didnt think i was going to, but the water just feels so good to
labor in, especially this one. i had my two previous births at a birth center
which had the porcelain tubs-but now i know... they do not compare to this. this
one was a blow up one, which is soft and has handles you can lean into, plus i
could fill it up much deeper. im pretty much saying the birthing tub is my
favorite. now i was no longer breathing through my surges very well and just
full on letting my body lead. my body was naturally "nudging" baby down. i did
have specific instructions for david and my midwife towards the end... that when
baby started crowning they needed to remind me to change my breath and slow
down. i really didnt want to have stitches;) so baby was crowning and they told
me to breath "up" which is like quick hyperventillating breaths upwards. it
sounds counterintuitive and doesnt feel natural at all, but it is highly
effective in slowing down and allowing your body to stretch. i remember at this
point looking out my bathroom window. the sun was rising. it was so beautiful.
the light came through. i felt so calm. i was wearing both my mom and grandma's
rings. i felt their presence and the power of the feminine... it was probably a
split second moment, but it was my most powerful moment throughout my entire
birth. 7:29 am. baby girl in all her tininess came into this world. our sunrise
girl. my midwife quickly unwrapped her cord around her neck and brought her up
to my chest. there is no other moment that compares to this. i cannot even
attempt to explain. my midwives team, teryl (who i couldnt have done it without),
amber, and kalli with birth mind body were seriously amazing. they were so calm,
strong, and super educated-it gave me such a peace of mind. it was pretty cool
to be surrounded by these amazing women as they helped me bring my baby girl
here. and david. oh man. he was such a freaking rock. i know he didnt feel good
at all and he was a rockstar through the whole night. he is so involved and
supportive, and right by my side when i needed him most. we woke the kids up and
we all cuddled on our bed and stared in awe of our new baby sis. there is
something so great about having your little family there in your own space. i didnt have to pack a hospital bag, figure out who would watch my kids in the middle of the night, and the list goes on. heck,
i didnt have to leave my house for one checkup during my whole pregnancy. i
created a peaceful space in my room where i prepared for birth and it just felt
so right to birth there after all the nights and hours of meditating and
visualizing it. it's pretty cool that i literally told my husband, sister, and
friend that i was just going to labor in the night while everyone was asleep and
baby would come in the morning as the kids woke up. and that is literally what
happened. i went into this pregnancy having to totally rely on faith and trust.
i studied a lot and learned so much more this time around. i was more open to
all the possibilities while also much more detailed in what i wanted to
experience with this birth. this being my last pregnancy, i just wanted to put
in the work with no regrets. i didn't want to go into the birth not feeling
prepared mentally. someone once asked, if you were a marathon runner would you
prepare for the big race by just getting new running shoes, maybe a new outfit,
or just figuring out the logistics? no. you would prepare physically and
mentally. at least if you wanted to accomplish it. and that is what (natural) labor day is
kinda like. a marathon. its definitely something to prepare for, and the more
mentally and physically you can prepare, the better the outcome. just like most
things in life. i am so grateful for this experience. i have learned that i am
much stronger than i even thought before. creating life is the most miraculous
and beautiful experience that i will ever be a part of. i am forever grateful.
so we had a few names picked out and as names are the hardest part for me, we decided
to wait until we could meet her. the crazy thing is, i have a video back in july
when we told our two kids they were going to have a new baby soon-river says in
it, "lets name HER, Riley Sage." which i quickly replied, we dont even know if
it is a boy or girl yet. he did that with rumi too... when we found out rumi's
gender he turned to mowgli and said, "we're going to have a baby rumi sister".
we were like, ok, thats the name we are going with. so river pretty much sealed
the deal on both his sister's names. her name is also inspired by two very
important people in my life, two people who mean more to me than words can
say... hint: both their birthdays are on september 5;)
introducing:
Riley Sage Campbell
6 lbs 3 oz
18 in
we are full of more love than we know what to do with. she is pure heaven,
peace, and everything good. we love you to inifinity and beyond baby girl.
xo
ps. shout out to my sister and my nephew, Ryder. they came and got river and
rumi and mowgli too. they made them feel so special and spoiled them all day
while mom and dad slept. it was so needed after what felt like a sickness
marathon weekend/birthday party;) thank you times one million!
